i will update after i get over it.
follow me on twitter then, (massiveabyss)
Or in Facebook. i may even create Word press, with my phone(:
The End.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
currently listening to the songs sung by The veronicas.
Revenge is sweeter than you ever were (: love this song. i want to shout it in your ears.
i cut my hair today. the sides are aa little way out of shape and weird, but when it grows long it will be nice (: and it cost me !!! 2.80! woohoo! damn cheap. now i can cut my hair all day long.
WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW SOMETHING?!
I WANT TO SING REVENGE IS SWEETER THAN YOU EVER WERE TO YOU :D
Saturday, May 23, 2009
i am going to blog a exciting post today. JUST FOR BERNICE'S SAKE!
i have been lectured at for 2 days.
i have been lectured at for 2 straight hours yesterday, bcos of my results.
i am still going to be nagged at till i get my life straight and organized.
we decided to give the dog away. gave it away today..
gave it to this nice looking cheena aunty.
watched a movie and got back my dog.
apparently, my dear dog bit that nice looking cheena aunty..
no one dared to go near him. he just stood in a corner. very still.
for 3hours.. very still i mean.
i think he just panic there feeling helpless. probably angry at me.
went to pick him up. was standing outside the door. he stil STOOD THERE.
i felt like a jerk.
went into the house. called out his name. and he ran really happy into my arms. wwith really happy waggity tail.
took him back home. he is tired.
bought Iphone this afternoon.
decided to get my life starighthen out.
get my life super organized.
get healthy and healthy.
eat more. sleep more..
study more.
organized my life.
this is my exciting day.
i have been lectured at for 2 days.
i have been lectured at for 2 straight hours yesterday, bcos of my results.
i am still going to be nagged at till i get my life straight and organized.
we decided to give the dog away. gave it away today..
gave it to this nice looking cheena aunty.
watched a movie and got back my dog.
apparently, my dear dog bit that nice looking cheena aunty..
no one dared to go near him. he just stood in a corner. very still.
for 3hours.. very still i mean.
i think he just panic there feeling helpless. probably angry at me.
went to pick him up. was standing outside the door. he stil STOOD THERE.
i felt like a jerk.
went into the house. called out his name. and he ran really happy into my arms. wwith really happy waggity tail.
took him back home. he is tired.
bought Iphone this afternoon.
decided to get my life starighthen out.
get my life super organized.
get healthy and healthy.
eat more. sleep more..
study more.
organized my life.
this is my exciting day.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Friday, May 8, 2009
Sunday, May 3, 2009
i gave up. for the social studies test tml.
GREAT!.
i amilessly search http://www.ask.com/ for really retarded questions. and then i tried their solutions at once but i realised it was probably not enough, it didnt change anything. i shouldnt have express in the very beginning.as time goes by, the distance is very much far apart. will it ever? ever be the same.guess the questions i ask? its gonna make you laugh like mad. i feel hopeless. how to solve xxxxxxxxxx? how to cure xxxxxxxxxx? how to ammend xxxxxxxxxx? how to repair xxxxxxxxxx? it ends with the letter H! :D
JESSE McCartney! TOLD YOU SO!
GREAT!.
i amilessly search http://www.ask.com/ for really retarded questions. and then i tried their solutions at once but i realised it was probably not enough, it didnt change anything. i shouldnt have express in the very beginning.as time goes by, the distance is very much far apart. will it ever? ever be the same.guess the questions i ask? its gonna make you laugh like mad. i feel hopeless. how to solve xxxxxxxxxx? how to cure xxxxxxxxxx? how to ammend xxxxxxxxxx? how to repair xxxxxxxxxx? it ends with the letter H! :D
JESSE McCartney! TOLD YOU SO!
Friday, May 1, 2009
Monday, April 27, 2009
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Saturday, April 25, 2009
PHMF! WOW MAN WOW!
went to eat with shuting today at hougang mall!
WOW! we saw this table, THIS PERSON!
Chop the table with all her PLASTIC BAGS!
FOR LIKE MORE THAN AN HOUR!
ISIT PRO OR ISIT PRO?! Unblievable.
no one can be more KAI SU THAN THIS PERSON!
make all the people stand there wait..
all wondering.,
I WROTE A LETTER TO THIS PERSON!
hahahah! damn fuckup letter!
all the bad chim chim english words come out.
HOPE THE PERSON READ IT!
update more later on!
off to play Pool with my family (:
went to eat with shuting today at hougang mall!
WOW! we saw this table, THIS PERSON!
Chop the table with all her PLASTIC BAGS!
FOR LIKE MORE THAN AN HOUR!
ISIT PRO OR ISIT PRO?! Unblievable.
no one can be more KAI SU THAN THIS PERSON!
make all the people stand there wait..
all wondering.,
I WROTE A LETTER TO THIS PERSON!
hahahah! damn fuckup letter!
all the bad chim chim english words come out.
HOPE THE PERSON READ IT!
update more later on!
off to play Pool with my family (:
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
The Dimension of Time..
i love this hell of a SEXY Monster :D
the skepctical truth of hope.
i hope it gets better,
but it will take me a rather long time.
as things falls in to their rightful place.
i will always be here.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Malaysia!
went to malaysia today! (:
bought some DVDs. went home and i watched 1 show! guess what?! the pirated disc has a legal advertisment telling me to watch orginal disc instead of watching pirated!
GREAT! THE PIRATED DISC TELLING ME TO BUY ORIGINAL DICS! HOW IRONIC!
oh! i bought THE UNBORN! BERNICE LETS WATCH TOGETHER SOMETIME!
there was a physics test today! im bound to fail... bcos i did all these yesterday!
i like the one i took with bernice!! though i kinda look like that fucktardD:
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Interrupted Sex Tape - watch more funny videos
went out today. studied. and talked.
i played the anzotomic reaction on xinyi today!
Saturday, April 11, 2009
the best of both worlds. no one could have it unless its hanna montanna.HA! cant believe it i stil can joke. not alot of people can have the best of both worlds. but im hoping and giving you it..
i hope you had enjoyed your day with him around.i knew you did.its clearly stated in your eyes and smile. its what i wished for.. dont be guilty or sorry for i hadnt regret my decision for his appearence, i know this is prolly what you would want, for him to come. so dont be guilty or sorry for i am not. dont try too hard either, its not making things any better..i appreciate the efforts. i would just be contented as long as you're happy, then i am too. the best of both worlds..
i was alone on the bus.i was alone while walking towards my destination.i was alone while walking back.i played alone with my superboard!.i was alone and i enjoyed it. the silence that compliments the voidness in me. i greatly enjoyed my walk back home.
and then i found out that
EVEN THOUGH I PLUG MY EARPIECE IN! THE SOUND STIL CAME OUT FROM MY PHONE AND THE EARPIECE! ZOMG! wth?! and then i stonned there.
Confessions of a Bimboholic.
Main Lead Role : Bernice
Clothes in the movie: Brown/Black/Beige Clothes.Hat.Shorts.Skirts.Jeans.Bra.Panty.Hoodie!
Name in show: Bernice
Story line: the confessions of a bimbo. as she tries hard not to. but in the end, she tried to hard and still end up as a bimbo.
i fought back tears on the bus 43.
and they still parachute down.
i had decieved myself for the tears that fell,
wishing that those tears fell for no apparent reason.
dont be guilty or sorry or hurt.
its hurting me, alot.
for yet, it still hurt like crazy to see it in your
eyes,smile,actions,body language, laughter.
hurt like crazy.
i hope you had enjoyed your day with him around.i knew you did.its clearly stated in your eyes and smile. its what i wished for.. dont be guilty or sorry for i hadnt regret my decision for his appearence, i know this is prolly what you would want, for him to come. so dont be guilty or sorry for i am not. dont try too hard either, its not making things any better..i appreciate the efforts. i would just be contented as long as you're happy, then i am too. the best of both worlds..
i was alone on the bus.i was alone while walking towards my destination.i was alone while walking back.i played alone with my superboard!.i was alone and i enjoyed it. the silence that compliments the voidness in me. i greatly enjoyed my walk back home.
and then i found out that
EVEN THOUGH I PLUG MY EARPIECE IN! THE SOUND STIL CAME OUT FROM MY PHONE AND THE EARPIECE! ZOMG! wth?! and then i stonned there.
Confessions of a Bimboholic.
Main Lead Role : Bernice
Clothes in the movie: Brown/Black/Beige Clothes.Hat.Shorts.Skirts.Jeans.Bra.Panty.Hoodie!
Name in show: Bernice
Story line: the confessions of a bimbo. as she tries hard not to. but in the end, she tried to hard and still end up as a bimbo.
i fought back tears on the bus 43.
and they still parachute down.
i had decieved myself for the tears that fell,
wishing that those tears fell for no apparent reason.
dont be guilty or sorry or hurt.
its hurting me, alot.
for yet, it still hurt like crazy to see it in your
eyes,smile,actions,body language, laughter.
hurt like crazy.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Sorry to you.Sorry to her.Sorry to the world for all the mistakes i've done.it was all but a mistake of mine to have caused all the miseries.i the one to be blame for all the pain felt.
my stupid foolish actions have caused much hurt. for that i am sorry for. and from now, im going to be the best everybody wants me to be. when im with you, i be the perfect person you want me to be. when im with her i will be the perfect person she wants me to be. when im with anyone,i'll be the perfect person they want me to be. the perfect charmeleon that will change anytime,anywhere.a charmeleon that has that perfect smile. that perfect charcter. that perfect person every individual wants me to be.thats what i am going to do. a changed person.
the quantum of distance.
when i am here thinking..
you are there thinking, whats the difference of our thoughts? ironical isnt it?i thought about us for the past month, while you were there thinking bout that idiot whom which may hurt you,that i fear of.when i found out, how sad you were. i was hurting for you, that i am remorseful.and then i think back..was just wondering, does he mean more or me?
HAHAHAH!
Remorse.
my stupid foolish actions have caused much hurt. for that i am sorry for. and from now, im going to be the best everybody wants me to be. when im with you, i be the perfect person you want me to be. when im with her i will be the perfect person she wants me to be. when im with anyone,i'll be the perfect person they want me to be. the perfect charmeleon that will change anytime,anywhere.a charmeleon that has that perfect smile. that perfect charcter. that perfect person every individual wants me to be.thats what i am going to do. a changed person.
the quantum of distance.
when i am here thinking..
you are there thinking, whats the difference of our thoughts? ironical isnt it?i thought about us for the past month, while you were there thinking bout that idiot whom which may hurt you,that i fear of.when i found out, how sad you were. i was hurting for you, that i am remorseful.and then i think back..was just wondering, does he mean more or me?
HAHAHAH!
Remorse.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Remorse..
what do i do now.i shouldnt have.i shouldnt do it.i shouldnt..
it was I guess...a mistake of mine from Remorse...the start. for now i am hurting.i believe you are too?..i would like to actually believe that i hurt you, so it shows to me that i actually mean of something to you.Ha..
if i were to keep my stupid emotions shut.if i did not So?..voice myself. if i were to bottle myself up.
and to try to not let my Crap!thoughts get over me. i think too much. i think alot.. damn my brain.
i am a super fuckup person.the most stupid in the world. easily jeaolous. paranoid with thoughts.super insecure. a fool set in my world of emotions.so i am a fuckup person.
no one person,Now what? would be to retarded to hurt another like that and end up,the world comes crashing down.so for i am a fool.a idiot for being like that.no Fuckup i am.words could describe what i am feeling now. i myself are not sure of what am i thinking and feelikng right now either.
i feel empty.like my internal parts are all dig out of my body. like a skeleton.this burning bitter sensation in my throat.Dumbshit.i feel the bitterness in me.Lost..i hope i am able to loose all my emotions.
a skeleton with no emotions.tears falling for no apparent logical reasons i can think of.
i feel like an idiot for my actions.its all my god damn What now?fault.Damn!a fault of mine. i am a sinner.
i like that the small fonts of these passage.
i am sorry..
it was I guess...a mistake of mine from Remorse...the start. for now i am hurting.i believe you are too?..i would like to actually believe that i hurt you, so it shows to me that i actually mean of something to you.Ha..
if i were to keep my stupid emotions shut.if i did not So?..voice myself. if i were to bottle myself up.
and to try to not let my Crap!thoughts get over me. i think too much. i think alot.. damn my brain.
i am a super fuckup person.the most stupid in the world. easily jeaolous. paranoid with thoughts.super insecure. a fool set in my world of emotions.so i am a fuckup person.
no one person,Now what? would be to retarded to hurt another like that and end up,the world comes crashing down.so for i am a fool.a idiot for being like that.no Fuckup i am.words could describe what i am feeling now. i myself are not sure of what am i thinking and feelikng right now either.
i feel empty.like my internal parts are all dig out of my body. like a skeleton.this burning bitter sensation in my throat.Dumbshit.i feel the bitterness in me.Lost..i hope i am able to loose all my emotions.
a skeleton with no emotions.tears falling for no apparent logical reasons i can think of.
i feel like an idiot for my actions.its all my god damn What now?fault.Damn!a fault of mine. i am a sinner.
i like that the small fonts of these passage.
i am sorry..
Thursday, April 2, 2009
My Wish lyrics
I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,
But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
And you always give more than you take.
But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
This is my wish
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big
I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,
But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
And you always give more than you take.
But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
This is my wish
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big
THIS STUPID BLOGGER DONT LET ME PUT @ENTERS@ in my post!
WHAT THE BUCK?!
i am hearing my life would suck w/o you by Kelly Clarkson.
love the lyrics. what ironical and contradictive truth.
AUGUST
Loves to joke. Attractive. Suave and caring. Brave and fearless.Firm and has leadership qualities. Knows how to console others. Too generous and egoistic. Takes high pride of oneself. Thirsty for praises. Extraordinary spirit. Easily angered. Angry when provoked. Easily jealous. Observant. Careful and cautious. Thinks quickly. Independent thoughts. Loves to lead and to be led. Loves to dream. Talented in the arts, music and defense. Sensitive but not petty. Poor resistance against illnesses. Learns to relax. Hasty and trusty. Romantic. Loving and caring. Loves to make friends .
December
Loyal and generous. Sexy. Patriotic. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Loves to socialize. Loves praises. Loves attention. Loves to be loved. Honest and trustworthy. Not pretending. Short tempered. Changing personality. Not egoistic. Take high pride in oneself. Hates restrictions. Loves to joke. Good sense of humor. Logical.
kind of true in a way.
i wonder where in the world had things gone wrong.
confused.fuckup.
i am fucked up! UP UP UP and away!
i am a fuck up person.
i hate myself. hate it. total hate me.
i shouldnt have.
i shouldnt do it.
i shouldnt thought of it.
SERANGOON OUIII! SERANGOON AHYEEE!
make my day.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Super Board! WOOSH WOOSH!
i need to play my SUPERBOARD SOON!
anyone! Free? this sunday perhaps? or Friday?
ioamsomoolarsayiysoilfuf
here i am, and there you are.i wanted to hate myself. an excuse.a punishment made to myself.
i was so ready to call myself a fool.for i condemmend myself.i blame myself.it seems and means so much to me.i thought and thinks, its all my fault. im to blame.im a fucker. a god damn fucker. there was a chance.i could have.i never have a road to redemption.
i made this decision so long ago. but never able to enforce it.im hoping i could. i found the best method. the best way. to defend myself. to make sure i never will be fix up in such a situation.to prevent myself from getting hurt.from the few caught up situations i was in like before. and it all comes down to my fault. i was too fucked up. wasnt it?. i probably did too much, where the word reciprocate never comes in.im am ultra fucked up.why do these things keep happening to me. its because im fucked up. i look myself into the mirror, and i saw this fucked up person.its in my character.to fuck things up all at the end of the day.
so many questions appear in my head. i thought of this, and i thought of that.
i was just wondering about this afternoon. have? did? what? who? how? had? huh?
theres this main question swimming thru my exploding head.
does he know? did you tell him? i would gladly accept a lie, i guess.
here i am. thinking much this past week.and there you are thinking about other things.
i shouldnt doubt. im the fuck up one in the first place..
anyone! Free? this sunday perhaps? or Friday?
ioamsomoolarsayiysoilfuf
here i am, and there you are.i wanted to hate myself. an excuse.a punishment made to myself.
i was so ready to call myself a fool.for i condemmend myself.i blame myself.it seems and means so much to me.i thought and thinks, its all my fault. im to blame.im a fucker. a god damn fucker. there was a chance.i could have.i never have a road to redemption.
i made this decision so long ago. but never able to enforce it.im hoping i could. i found the best method. the best way. to defend myself. to make sure i never will be fix up in such a situation.to prevent myself from getting hurt.from the few caught up situations i was in like before. and it all comes down to my fault. i was too fucked up. wasnt it?. i probably did too much, where the word reciprocate never comes in.im am ultra fucked up.why do these things keep happening to me. its because im fucked up. i look myself into the mirror, and i saw this fucked up person.its in my character.to fuck things up all at the end of the day.
so many questions appear in my head. i thought of this, and i thought of that.
i was just wondering about this afternoon. have? did? what? who? how? had? huh?
theres this main question swimming thru my exploding head.
does he know? did you tell him? i would gladly accept a lie, i guess.
here i am. thinking much this past week.and there you are thinking about other things.
i shouldnt doubt. im the fuck up one in the first place..
Saturday, March 28, 2009
WHAT A HOT DAY! and TOMORROW!
<-- I HAVE THIS! its much nicer though.in real. 
<-- I LIKE THIS! THIS IS NOT IN THE SHOP! 
i spent my saturday. Working as FREE LABOUR!
and its going to be the same thing, tomorrow.
should i go? im still thinking. the two way benefits.
Go, i would be able to have fun with my SuperBoard!
( okay. i named my Board. DO NOT JUDGE ME )
UnGo. InGo, i would be able to have fun and watch tv!
glad i went there too. i found this super big! super cheap! SUPER HOT!
TWILIGHT POSTER! woot me! i bought 2.
i bought this skate board! cost 150$ damn! wad a great day!
and i think im gonna be tan till im national flag soon.
busy busy busy day!
what a busy day!
god forbids me to know.
but i found it out by an innocent coincidence.
i was then filled with paroxysms of emotions.
and then i realise it was all but a mistake of mine from the start.
Things will never be the same again.
FINE! God damn Fine! dont even bother!
FINE! God damn Fine! dont even bother!
went out today to TOWN!
I WATCH PUAL BLART MALL COP!
omg. laugh the whole show, i guessed i need laughter that much.
i met LENNARD! when i was waiting for that idiot.
he was gorging himself on the burger. and he stop to talk to me.
didnt expect that though, so this means hes a good guy! haha
gorging and gorging on the burger.
had a fun time.
i need it badly.
talked alot too.
CHOM CHOM CHOM NOM NOM NOM!
im gonna learn about the DJ player; its cheap!
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
John Ledgend; Everybody Knows Nobody Really Knows..
current songs in my head;the lyrics.
Ina - Fall
Ina - I Wanted You
Enrique - Somebodys me
Jason Mraz - if It Kills Me
John Ledgend - Everybody Knows.
David Archuleta - A Little Too Not Over You
James Morrison ft. Nelly Furtado - Broken Strings.
i had the much urge to post all the songs html here.to share the songs.
this are the only few. theres so much more..
i need music to be the background of my life.
eitherwise, it would be such a void world.
im thanking Chong PeiYun Here.
or else shes gonna irritate me whole night.
thanks :D
! jacket !
i like and dislike the uses of it!
;keeps warm and protect;
i feel like a fool.i all jet pack set ready.but yet, i get pull back.
and then i fall into the abyss.and i just stay rooted here in my place.
Ina - Fall
Ina - I Wanted You
Enrique - Somebodys me
Jason Mraz - if It Kills Me
John Ledgend - Everybody Knows.
David Archuleta - A Little Too Not Over You
James Morrison ft. Nelly Furtado - Broken Strings.
i had the much urge to post all the songs html here.to share the songs.
this are the only few. theres so much more..
i need music to be the background of my life.
eitherwise, it would be such a void world.
im thanking Chong PeiYun Here.
or else shes gonna irritate me whole night.
thanks :D
! jacket !
i like and dislike the uses of it!
;keeps warm and protect;
i feel like a fool.i all jet pack set ready.but yet, i get pull back.
and then i fall into the abyss.and i just stay rooted here in my place.
Monday, March 23, 2009
faded shadows..
i have regreted it..shouldnt have typed out those words.its making me miserable.i feel pathetic.
theres this much repulsion, detest, disgustion felt.
i shouldnt have..
theres this much repulsion, detest, disgustion felt.
i shouldnt have..
no longer the shinning new toy..
how ironic can this world be.that intriguing force that pulls you in.as you go against the world order to find that little cryptic truth.even if. you do know that its going to bring me that unfathomable unexplainable vexation.as you are enthralled by this absolutely indifferent new obsession.that indifferent attitude makes you feel even more vextated.and you would still have to act nochalant bout it.i hate it when contractditions occurs.the skeptical questions asked.will you fathom these vextations inflicted..
i have been backspacing my typed out word alot, recently.my head feels like its about to explode right infront of this computer.with all the blood splashed onto the screen as i see my thoughts scattered all over.i guessed you would know this is about you. Or.. stay oblivious.i backspace and contradict myself everytime i wish to blog.i would not want to cause unwelcome reactions.but then i thought,
whats the point of blogging if you are actually not able to post what you really are feeling.even if you do blog, there is the obvious hidded words and tone as you are not able to totally type it in full meanings. as you hide the true meanings.for the contradicitons
i frustrate myself with all the vexations caused by you.would you stay oblivious or are u acting oblivious to these truths.things has been worser and worser as day passes.i guess you found your shinning new toy.and its obvious that im no longer that shinning new toy.it still agonizes me though, to realise this.i kept asking myself.when i went to the back of the class to read the notes, all i thought was BullShits.time and again, situations has taught me that things will never last, or am i so unlucky that im always caught up on situations like that.and then i reflected on myself, and i thought of the law of contradictions. its probably that i give myself too much that the law of contradictions occurs.isit because i was always there whenever wherever? isit because i've put in too much? isit because i've made myself too easy to reach?isit because im always easy to be used?i hate myself for always being abused.would you feel the same way as i feel, the agonizing vextations i feel.i would deem myself rather as putting alot of a little bit of everything into this f/s. it seems that eveytime the same thing occurs.always the same reason.
i was backspacing again..
the thing that cant seem to get out of my mind.why isit that when i leterally begged you, and you refuse to budge in to my requests.and you agreed instantly the moment that new toy asked you.and the reason was, that the lighthing was brighter.i do admit that im abit jealous lah.but as a Leo, as me, i thought the WHOLE world knows im sensitive and insecure.i feel that you do know that im pissed off. and i do know that you are pissed off too.i thought that i would at least be the one person,able to be let you trust.i hope im able to be trusted by you.to be at least a good friend to you.no matter what. what sets the difference between the shinning new toy whom seems to dazzle you at the moment whereasi thought i was that good friend.who am i?what do i mean to you?or am i just a Thing..
i seldom so damn freaking well to a person.and cant u see that i actually treat u god damn well? there are the only 3 that i've treated well.two of them left me deeply dissapointed. there was Sheri.Yunting.Peiyun.suddenly. i miss peiyun so much.the urge to just see her or talk to her.Chong PeiYun, if you read this. be glad i mentioned you name. i knw you have always wish for me to admit that i miss you(:
after typing so much, i have the thought to backspace all of these..i hope things would be better and not worsen.i hope even if i did not backspace, we would still be the same.though i know that would be difficult..i do not want to wish to regret not backspacing my thoughts..i cant believe it that i've type so much till now.. and i aint feeling any better.its making me so miserable. i am pretty emo. goddamnit.im glad my family is eating out today.i gave me a reason.i would have drag my feet there..at about 30cm per second..
i have so much more to say...
i keep edditing this post..
Chapters of the Day...
i backspaced my 9 chapters.. and re post it back.
im vextated.
i feel like Edward, when he knew about
the baby, and what it was doing to bella.
the agonizing stare he gave jacob when
he knelt to the ground and begged jacob.
hysterical..
i have been backspacing my typed out word alot, recently.my head feels like its about to explode right infront of this computer.with all the blood splashed onto the screen as i see my thoughts scattered all over.i guessed you would know this is about you. Or.. stay oblivious.i backspace and contradict myself everytime i wish to blog.i would not want to cause unwelcome reactions.but then i thought,
whats the point of blogging if you are actually not able to post what you really are feeling.even if you do blog, there is the obvious hidded words and tone as you are not able to totally type it in full meanings. as you hide the true meanings.for the contradicitons
i frustrate myself with all the vexations caused by you.would you stay oblivious or are u acting oblivious to these truths.things has been worser and worser as day passes.i guess you found your shinning new toy.and its obvious that im no longer that shinning new toy.it still agonizes me though, to realise this.i kept asking myself.when i went to the back of the class to read the notes, all i thought was BullShits.time and again, situations has taught me that things will never last, or am i so unlucky that im always caught up on situations like that.and then i reflected on myself, and i thought of the law of contradictions. its probably that i give myself too much that the law of contradictions occurs.isit because i was always there whenever wherever? isit because i've put in too much? isit because i've made myself too easy to reach?isit because im always easy to be used?i hate myself for always being abused.would you feel the same way as i feel, the agonizing vextations i feel.i would deem myself rather as putting alot of a little bit of everything into this f/s. it seems that eveytime the same thing occurs.always the same reason.
i was backspacing again..
the thing that cant seem to get out of my mind.why isit that when i leterally begged you, and you refuse to budge in to my requests.and you agreed instantly the moment that new toy asked you.and the reason was, that the lighthing was brighter.i do admit that im abit jealous lah.but as a Leo, as me, i thought the WHOLE world knows im sensitive and insecure.i feel that you do know that im pissed off. and i do know that you are pissed off too.i thought that i would at least be the one person,able to be let you trust.i hope im able to be trusted by you.to be at least a good friend to you.no matter what. what sets the difference between the shinning new toy whom seems to dazzle you at the moment whereasi thought i was that good friend.who am i?what do i mean to you?or am i just a Thing..
i seldom so damn freaking well to a person.and cant u see that i actually treat u god damn well? there are the only 3 that i've treated well.two of them left me deeply dissapointed. there was Sheri.Yunting.Peiyun.suddenly. i miss peiyun so much.the urge to just see her or talk to her.Chong PeiYun, if you read this. be glad i mentioned you name. i knw you have always wish for me to admit that i miss you(:
after typing so much, i have the thought to backspace all of these..i hope things would be better and not worsen.i hope even if i did not backspace, we would still be the same.though i know that would be difficult..i do not want to wish to regret not backspacing my thoughts..i cant believe it that i've type so much till now.. and i aint feeling any better.its making me so miserable. i am pretty emo. goddamnit.im glad my family is eating out today.i gave me a reason.i would have drag my feet there..at about 30cm per second..
i have so much more to say...
i keep edditing this post..
Chapters of the Day...
i backspaced my 9 chapters.. and re post it back.
im vextated.
i feel like Edward, when he knew about
the baby, and what it was doing to bella.
the agonizing stare he gave jacob when
he knelt to the ground and begged jacob.
hysterical..
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
FUNNY!
OH MY! I WATCHED IT THE UMPTEEN TIMES! AND IM STILL LAUGHING!
okay..seems to be rather melodramatic.
feeling like a fucking fool.
im sticking to my Law Of Contradictions.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
FML..
SEXY BEASTS!
i am so going to fail my test today D:
TAN WEIXIN TRICKED ME TODAY!
i got KETCHUP ALL OVER MY HANDS!
damn it! and it still smells like ketchup!
F.M.L
fuck.my.life
how ironic can this world be.that intriguing force that pulls you in.as you go against the world order to find that little cryptic truth.even if. you do know that its going to bring me that unfathomable unexplainable vexation.as you are enthralled by this absolutely indifferent new obsession.that indifferent attitude makes you feel even more vextated.and you would still have to act nochalant bout it.i hate it when contractditions occurs.the skeptical questions asked.will you fathom these vextations inflicted..
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